a girl u never quite get what u see

Wednesday, December 20, 2006

yen told me once that i have the tendancies to put the same person on my pendulum scale that cannot decide . I swing from one extreme to the other. She is right. There's this box that i keep recently that i use to safe guard some of my most recent and sweet(bitter) tokens. The MILK pink and black HUG card, the dollar disney note , the pic and the diary. Shits. I always tend to blah blah on when i had to lie, when i had to hide the jitterness, or when i have to say out loud what have been on mind for ages. T T for short.

You know how its is when u tell one small lie, u often have to tell another to cover up tt first initial lie . Then its snowball. Or how when u keep postponing an apologise, u keep thinking its too late anyway,and eventually lost the courage to say. Or just plainly brain wash yourself that no one is hurt , really. And when once-so-closed friends distant cos of time and you think "it's life" or "it doesn't matter, we can pick up where we were anytime.." How come blah blahblah seems second nature .

Point is i never ever get to say out my main point at crunch time. blah blah blah I end up saying everything else but not the pt. Like above. wasteee timeeeee

SHOUTOUTS
Winnie if you are reading my blog still, meet up soon ookies... Maybe a spontaneous meet up some day soon. makan , jalat jalat. hee

Kl, next yr no more lunch dates . no more tues with kl le . =(

initially i was happy with any pay above 300 for my IA. But as i saw my employment letter and remember what you said about yr pathetic poor pay. Then i see the figures on the letter that mirror yours, now i think i am poor thing las. So little.. hees. I think only one person know what the sum is sia. Anyway pay is hush hush rites... (in blogs) But at least its marketing department. i likeeeee

Email and total honesty goes hand in hand for me. Often when i tk this risk, it really mean that i am either at my edge or is ready to forgo what i could lost. No courage to do this , could mean that i am not at the end or is not ready to tk the risk of losing everything. . .

good byes..

ning11:41 PM

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