a girl u never quite get what u see

Friday, January 27, 2006

I think guys are funny species. When they are still boys, they always make a face when u try to kiss them or when u actually successfully sneaked a kiss or two. Then when they are no longer smooth skin AND cute, ahahha, AND became OLDER.... well, things changes, don't they? =P Ze is one big funny example of how a BOY KID works. He thinks he is so cool and physical attractiveness matters so much to him that at Europe when its so cold and windy he insisted on wearing his "nice jacket" and nothing else. Dark blue sweater with a hood won't do for him. He goes w/o the scrafs till he sees fellow boys his age wearing them. He blows dry his hair before sleep and when he wakes up, so that he can get the "stand up" effect. Ze thinks botak means not having your hair grows back EVER.(cos he saw a uncle for the longest time having no hair at all, by choice. this he did not know though.hahaha) When i hold his hand and tease that i am going to tell the other boys cousins tt he holds my hand, he remarked that he can say," We were crossing the road mah...".(we weren't crosing any road then.) boys~

Sometimes people surprised me. Or maybe fate surprised me more. When i am down or needs someone to talk to me, he will be online and initiate a conversation and then the feeling of lost and helplessness will be forgotten for that time. Its doesn't matter to him if our conversation may not always be 2-ways or that i may have more "hahahaha..." than any real messages. He continues to switch between my mood of "intellectual" and "nonsense crap and jokes" on msn and sometimes he reads my mind to that exact bits & i thought he had found my blog which i think he hasn't. Sometimes friends like him make me feel so rotten.

Some incidents in the past still stung whenever i think about them. And some of them tell so much about my character , i want to sink to the bottom of the ocean and lived in a bubble.Others i want to talk about it, but never could. Nothing seem apt to describe it anymore and feelings are bottomed up.

Life's been 'interesting' these days. Babyface*(names protected) in my lab class was friendly in the 2 lab sessions and we got along alright. At the third when he asked for my number "just in case he needs the readings and measurements " for his lab report, and then i offered to GIVE him my lab manual instead cos i dun need it anyway. Babyface sidestep and avoid my persistant offer of my lab manual and settles for my number instead. ahhaha, he remains me of Ze. Dunno why. Then there's the beng* in my lecture group. After 1 chanced meeting at the canteen where he happens to sit alone at my table and a lecture tog, he asked nonchantantly for my no. I wanted to ask him why. =? This time i really din want to give but didn't know how to reject either because of a ribena & tutorials.

Kl surprised me sometimes. When she mention at the table with the gals the reason why i am still single now, i really thought "wow tis gal knows me. Or its i must had really want her to know me." Cos honestly i forgot if i was the one who told her about it, or she figure it herself. My guess is the former. =) I dun think i have tell anyone else before the real reason except maybe yen.. hehe, its easier to lament about the high standards and missed opportunities. oh wellz. . . .

ning9:49 PM

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